Be our Friends But Don’t Try To Be Our Guardian

I work in an NGO and going to far flung areas is a part of my job. I am almost, on every day of my work, accompanied by a male colleague.  They can do many things which we cannot do but they cannot do everything.

It was just few days back I went off to a place with a colleague. While making way through the slopes I noticed that he was always at the back offering a helping hand. At first it was fine but eventually it annoyed me. He was trying to guard me – like you do with kids.  If I would fall he would offer me his hand. I appreciate his help but since I am a girl it doesn’t mean I cannot take care of myself.

I know how to take care of myself but this attitude of his guarding me crossed to me as much irritable. 

Well this isn’t the first instance I have been through all this, there have been many like this in past. I sometimes feel like guys have this innate habit of trying to be guardians of women. We never ask for help but they come automatically to be by our side. 

I have an elder brother who would accompany me everywhere I go when I was young. I was so dependent on him that at one point I couldn’t think of stepping out without him. I would blame my parents for it as they thought I am too feeble to do my job and always need a protector.  But then I put an end to all that. I am lucky enough to have him every time with me but I never felt a need of a body guard to shield me always and here I am today a self-sufficient person who needs very little help from men.

Society has a major role to play in it as well. Majority of us have been brought up with a mindset that a girl is delicate and should be handled with care. At universities and colleges I see girls accompanied by their parents or brothers etc doing the entire job while them sitting in a corner. 

Come on we have to change this set up. We are at par with all the qualities a man possess -- except few we don’t need. We don’t require a man to do our pity little jobs though we always need them as our brother, father or husband but not someone as our guardian. 

Why to rely on someone when you can do your work in a better manner.  

 

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